Wails From the Grave

To:

Jerome

of BSN040

I for once never thought that the experiences that you’ll meet along that road that are supposed to make you stronger, will instead rattle your beliefs and drift you further away from the person you wanted to be.

I want you to know that I am deeply ashamed of what you’ve become. The false dignity that you gaily parade is the only thing that keeps you from a total breakdown and utter humiliation. What happened to the friendships that you promised to have a tight grasp to? What happened to the uncompromising dedication that you once showed in your work? What happened to your grip in sanity that you now toy with your mind, fooling yourself that there might be a chance of love for a selfish and distant person like you? What happened to you?

I never imagined that you’d take for granted that patch and all the efforts and hardwork that you have invested to earn the right to wear it. Here I sit in the library today, allotting hours to study. Not because I’m obliged to, but because I enjoy doing so. It’s because nothing else makes my day than knowing by heart that I did my part and made sure that I’m worth what my parents are paying for. How about you Jerome? Are you worth it all? The endless spending and night-outs? I hope you can say that you are, Jerome, I really hope so, for the sake of your parents that work hard for you.

You had always known that your heart is on its own. Why dream that somewhere out there, there will be arms to hold you? That was our source of strength Jerome! Our concrete outlook in life that our happiness in any means is not defined by whether or not we have someone beside us! How could you left it in shambles?

Know that you’re the most pathetic person I’ve known. You’re behaving like an immature girl who flinches and lose yourself whenever you meet that guy. Hahaha. He doesn’t even talk to you nor contact you, yet you spent days and nights dreaming about him, even conniving with others to find a way to see him. When was the last time that you stopped and try to reflect on your ways? How could you have drifted, so far that I can’t see myself in you anymore? Every trace of my identity is completely gone, I do not know you anymore.

I know from the first day of college that by the time I graduate, I’ll be a completely different person, a better one. I acknowledge that because it’s inevitable. I could say that I’m looking forward in seeing the real me. But you? No. Not you. You are not the person I’m striving to be. God help me, I don’t want to end up like you.

From:

Jerome

of A0612K