Three More Weeks and I'm Outta Here!

Yes! After continous weeks of punsihments (sadly for me, no BDSM. Hahaha! Rawr!) I'm weeks away from coming home to my beloved hometown!

Whew! I can already picture the majestic Mayon in its full splendor and glory. I can already smell the scent of the sea (don't ask me what sea. there are too many of them in Tabaco) and of course, the unparred cookings of my lola! I just had enough of coming to school every week and then preparing myself for case presentation and ebn's! I'm so happy that even for a few days, I'd be able to be spared all of the toxicity and fugliness nursing brings!

Not to mention that friggin revalida! I spent one whole evening boring a hole through my notes (it was my classmate's notes actually) memorizing just to know that the skill that I'd be performing was the one I didn't study! Grrrrr! I was already anticipating that I'd demonstrate either LM or Pericare, but heck, PPE????!!!!! I didn't study that one!!

Good thing, and good heavens, that a former CI of mine was assigned to evaluate me. She's the CI that we had in Ma Clara Lying-in. Check my albums! Hahaha! We did nothing there but sleep! Anygays the funny thing I haven't done anything yet, but she was already grading me. Hahaha! She just told me "Ok, start talking about PPE," and then she sat down and acted as if I never existed, filling out my evaluation form. I even waited for her o finish 'evaluating' me before I started demonstarting the skill. Hahaha! I even got everything wrong except for the sequencing. In the end, I got 78. Given the fact that some were given 10 and 12 as their grade, I can't complain, can I?

OMG! I miss my friends! And what thrills me is that I'll be a ninong to my former classmate's child! Ahihihi! I'm so happy and proud for that classmate of mine. She definitely have our support.

Argh! One more obstacle which is the upcoming finals stand in the way! Hehehe! Di bale isang puyatan na lang yan! See you Tabaco in three weeks!

XOXO

Jerome

I Nearly Stepped Down from My Position

I don't know if its because of our damn graveyard shift, my lack of sleep or my being sensitive; but I guess there comes a time when a person really looses his cool and make lapse judgements. That happened to me the other night.

I was so frustrated and angry to the verge of crying. Luckily my groupmates were there to comfort me. I was really trembling when I forwarded this to my classmates.

BSN040

-GM-

GUD PM GUYS. FIRST OF ALL I WOULD LIKE TO THANK YOU FOR ELECTING ME NOT ONLY ONCE, BUT TWICE 4 PRCDNT. I AM ETERNALLY GRATEFUL FOR YOUR TRUST. BUT ITS TIME FOR YOU TO CHOOSE A NEW MAYOR. I KNOW ITS CORNY BECAUSE FEW WEEKS NA LANG, BUT I HAD ENOUGH.

I JUST HAD ENOUGH OF PEOPLE ANTICIPATNG FOR ME TO COMMIT A MISTAKE SO THAT THEY CAN BACKSTAB ME, LAUGH AT MY FACE OR SO THAT THEY CAN HAVE SOMETHING TO TALK ABOUT. I'M TIRED.

CHOOSE SOMEONE NA GUSTO NIYO UGALI. I'LL NEVER BE THE ONE WHO WILL LIFT A FINGER TO PLEASE OTHERS. SO PAG NAGKAMALI SIYA, IMBIS NA PAGTAWANAN NIYO EH TUTULUNGAN NIYO. GANON NAMAN TALAGA DAPAT DIBA?

ENWEIZ INFORM ME THE MOMENT YOU WERE ABLE TO CHOOSE. I'LL BE MORE THAN GLAD TO STEP DOWN.

I don't know if it's a sickening twist of fate but this message was only sent to one of my classmates. Becuase it's length summed up to 5 sms, I guess my cellphone had a hard time sending it. Hahaha. I just realized that I don't want to step down at all. I'm not gonna give up against people whose only way to elevate themselves is to bring others down.

This is perhaps my biggest rant ever. You know who you are. But definitely you're not the only one. Others can join you in your endless merry-making of hating on others. Funny because the only thing that you have to do is come to class, fix your make-up, make yourself beautiful and sign the fucking grade sheets. For later on I'd be the one who will deliver them to our respective faculties. But you can't even do that without being a whore and hurting the feelings of others.

It's is not the first time that you did something like this. You keep on complaining. But let me ask you, have you ever done something, even exerted an inch of an effort or sacrifice for the betterment of our class? I'll definitely pull your hair off that scalp of yours if you say yes.

I'm never the kind of person who brag all his works, especially if it's my responsibility. But every person in BSN040 knows that I get no help from others aside from my secretary and treasurer. Have you ever consider that before you narrowed down and insult my leadership? Were you even the kind of person who takes the first initiative to help our class? You might as well rot in hell if you say yes.

I will not be talked down by a mere socialite wannabe like you. I can't even believe that I'm buying this. This is the last time that I'm gonna address this issue. But try me, hahaha, try me one more time and you'd definitely get to know me. Way better. . .

Jerome

And His Name is Kevin

Hahaha! This is one of those days that I can't think of a decent topic to post for my blog. But that doesn't suggest that I'm not having a blast this past few days!

In our final rotation, we were assigned in this hospital in Pulilan. Just when I thought that I'd be weeping in endless days of taking vital signs and making that SOAPIE (don't even ask me what it is), this hot, hot staff nurse named Kevin suddenly showed up and made the private room sizzle! Nyahehehe!

He's definitely got the looks that I'd cream my pants for! Pure Filipino, dark and the mysterious type, whew! I had this feeling that he noticed that I was drooling over him, but hey, he didn't seem to mind. If anything I think he was amused. My groupmate Fe even asked for his schedule in the hospital. Hahaha! Too bad that I won't be seeing him until next week.

It's a shame that I really have somebody else in my mind. Ahihihi! But I don't think I'll be more than anyhting to him other than a familiar face that he sees whenever he attend to his morning class. Here I go again. Hahaha!

It's just that I've been constantly seeing him this past few days! I don't know. I was never the type of person who'd be able to put up the guts and make the first move to a guy, especially to a gay guy! That's one thing that I really cannot work myself on. Wish I was that aggressive.

But it doesn't matter anymore. For next week, I'm definitely putting my game face on when I finally conquer the dancefloor of Goverment. Hahahaha! Can't wait!

XOXO

Jerome

Tomorrow Morning. . .

I remember being asked by one guy on what is the most difficult, and perhaps most hurting, in falling in love. I didn't skipped a heartbeat when I said that it's when you always think about the person, he drives you crazy without even doing anything and he's the last person you fantasize (not in a lustful manner, mind you. more like the knight in shining armor thing. digging it? hahaha) of in the evening and the first upon waking up. . . and yet he doesn't know it. He doesn't know it because you definitely can't tell him, out of the fear that he'd laughed at your face, brag it to his friends, or because of the fear that your verbal acceptance of your feelings for him can blow all your rationality away, inevitably leaving you vulnerable.

I shouldn't have told him.

Whenever i reminisce about Flour, I always end up recalling this very specific afternoon. We were doing our rounds in CAT. Being a simple Raso, I have no choice but to be the underdog and follow whatever this officer of ours want us to do. I recall how he stood a feet away from me smiling at the person beside me. And that's it. It was the perfect scene. That's when I succumbed to this weird feelings that I was having and finally accept that, no matter how hard I try to hide my sexuality and my feelings, one way or another it will catch up on me. I remember closing my eyes for a very long time, trying to tone down this sudden rush of weakening nausea. And when I opened them, there he was, smiling at me. . .

Fate is always a step ahead of me. Just when I was trying to fight and keep in chains the persona lurking in me, it just keeps finding a way to take over.

I made one promise to myself. I'll never compromise. For I'd rather be alone like I am tonight, than settle for something that, given my sexuality, is so fragile and elusive. I'll never commit to any relationship, if I can help it. But the more I keep this promise, the more this persona tries to break free, reminding me that I'm a mere human, vulnerable and easily swayed.

I hope that when that side of me finally takes over, I wouldn't end up hurting again in the end. Cause now, I'm starting to feel it again. I don't want to reminisce in the future and regret that I shouldn't have read his article. . .

About Time!

Whew! After weeks of endless graveyard shifts, quizzes, drug studies and ebns, I finally regained some of my social life!

Last night was definitely a blast. The booze, smoking and dancing all came down as an intoxicating rush of euphoria. Just the thought of it makes me shiver. Hahaha! Eh kasi naman ang tagal ko nang hindi nakakalabas ng lungga diba? Fair lang naman siguro kung magsaya naman ako just for one night. Given the fact that revalida is scheduled next week, I have no choice but to adhere to my inner fiend and party!

And what's great is that I have the best crowd with me! Kim, Alma and Joyce would have sufficed but I guess it didn't hurt that they brought some of their party friends.

Hahaha! I recall how we dared Alma into asking this hot nerdy guy (which is my type, actually. I've been drooling over him since I entered the club) for his number. Little did I know that he overheard us and learned that it was me who's asking for his number! Haha! Of course the guy refused. Poor Alma. Nasupla ba. Hahaha!

Anygays after all the club lights, booze and dancing fades, I guess I haved to face the reality na ang dami kong assignment at quizzes na dapat asikasuhin! Hahaha! That's why I'm here downloading our slides for our quizz in Micro. Whew. Good luck sa akin!

XOXO

Jerome

Being a deep space explorer in my next life doesn't sound bad. . .

Just my way of killing time while I wait for the damn uploader to finish. These surveys are good. I'll try to make one next time. . .

Your result for Reincarnation Placement Exam...

Deep Space Explorer

59% Intrigue, 54% Civilization, 53% Humanity, 76% Urbanization.

Hmm... You're a tough one to place. Your answers indicate that you like technology and education. You enjoy intrigue, adventure and chaos. You're fine with hard work and civilization. This all bodes well for an interesting, adventurous life.

What makes it difficult, however, is that you don't seem to be much of a 'people person.'

If you were more of a people person, we would have commissioned you aboard the Starship Enterprise. But since you don't care much for the complications of dealing with your fellow man... we have another deep-space mission, more tailored for your tastes... a way for you to enjoy the benefits of high-tech civilization without having to put up with civilization itself. Let's set you up to pursue the solo career of a deep space explorer. You can go ahead and hibernate through the boring parts of your mission, and not worry so much about being a few decades out of touch with your fellows by the time you get home. In fact, you pretty much don't have to deal with people at all, but you can still enjoy a high-flying adventure of a life. Far, far away from the madding crowd, you get to play with your scientific instruments, serve your glorious civilization, and do interesting things with strange discoveries in exotic places.

The career might work out all right. Look what it did for Charlton Heston.

Take Reincarnation Placement Exam at HelloQuizzy

I Got Through!

I made it to the top five of the Pen Power preliminary screening! I am so happy! This is the first breakthrough in my career as a journalist, if I have one that is. Hahaha!

It was definitely, with no false humility, unexpected. I'm not always the organized person but I've come up with this; JEROME'S LIST OF REASONS ON WHY HE THOUGHT MAKING IT THROUGH THE PRELIMINARY SCREENING WAS HOPELESS. Hahaha! I know that all of these sound cheesy and that I might sound narcisstic and overreacting to something that might not even be of worth to others but hey, that was my first time to enter an essay writing competition, and I am just so ecstatic right now. Good thing that my classmates allowed me to represent them, not that I asked for their permission though. Hahaha!

1. The time limit and required number of words. As I've said in my previous blog, we were only given and hour and a half to finish what was suppose to be a 300-500 words essay. Since I was so taken aback by the topic, The Two Faces of Philippine Nursing: Meet Overpopulation and Underemployment, it took me a while to gather my thoughts. In the end, I finished a 200-word essay of 4 paragraphs. Given that, I should have been disqualified, right?

2. The contestants. Just by looking at the other 12 contestants from their respective sections, you could already tell that they were carefully chosen. So imagine how surprised I was when I learned that one of them was Dwight, the Editor in Chief of Advocate. And oh, did I mention, he was quite hot. Hahahaha! Anyway I wasn't able to see the actual list of those students who made it, I was just informed through text, so I'm not quite sure of myself really. Hahaha! But I'd love to see him at the actual competition on September 13. Nothing better to inspire me than a nerdy, silent and hot IN student. Nyahehehe!

3. My Interpretation of the Theme. As I've said the theme was "The Two Faces of Philippine Nursing: Meet Overpopulation and Underemployment". My intial thought was it's about how nurses today are so numerous while they are underemployed, which I dismissed early because I thought it was too narrow. Instead I wrote on how overpopulation and underemployment in the Philippines serve as a hindrance to optimum nursing care, which I entitled as Dwarfing the Root Causes of Nursing Deficit. I don't know but after I submitted it I felt so stupid because I really thought that my first intuition on the theme was the right one. I managed to read some of my peers title and it was about it too. That's why I was so drained and lost hope on making it to the actual competition. But well. . .

Hahaha! I just can't calm myself now. I've been meaning to try for the LAMP but I never had the guts. If I make it again this Sunday, of all the odds that are against me, I'll be a member of the LAMP staff! Not that I expect though. But I can dream. . . Nyahehehehe!

Kakabobo ang Pen Power na Iyon

And there I was thinking that it's gonna be a hell of an easy feat. Given the fact that I was not able to reach atleast 200 words (the required was 300-500 words. OMG), that there were only thirteen contestants (13?! There's suppose to be one representative in each 49 sections! Damn those mayors!) and that Dwight Idontknowhissurname who happens to be the editor in chief of the advocate was also a contestant (that was kinda unfair, wouldn't you agree? what's the sense of forbiding batch officers to join the competition when a bona fide writer like him can join????), my cheap thrill of having my name in the bulletin as one of the top five in the Pen Power competition will never be realized. Not that I care that much, mind you.

I am quite happy that I can now rant all I want. I just abhor the fact that essay writing is so annoyingly formal! What's the joy in writing if you can't include words like shit and damn in them? I'm so happy that I'm back to my usual blogging and that I can write whatever topic I want. Cause the topic "The Two Faces of Nursing: Meet Overpopulation and Underemployment" just makes me want to wet my pants. I was kinda hoping that the topic would be my forte, like same-sex marriage and gay rights. Hahaha!

But actually, putting the criteria of 300-500 words aside, I think I did fairly well. Given more time, I could have actually enjoyed that competition (we were only given one and a half hour). Good thing that majority of the contestants were only able to fill in the first page of their paper just like I did. Let's just see what happens. (not that I have a flicker of hope in winning, mind you)

XOXO

Jerome

P.S.

That was my first blog title in tagalog. Achievement!